Letters from Iris: Saying Goodbye to My Tech-Fearing Grandmother

This is my goodbye letter to my grandmother.

Image by Pixabay from Pexels

My 91-year-old grandmother passed away last month. I expected her to be gone soon, mostly because of her age and her constant daily prayer of “Take me now God!”

God granted that prayer at the end of January. She even requested no funeral service and to keep her obituary short. That woman was truly done with life here on earth. In a way, that provides comfort. I find it easier to let someone go when they are ready.

I still miss her despite knowing she wouldn’t be with us forever. We would exchange handwritten letters throughout the years talking about quick and light-hearted subjects like the weather and my daughter’s daily adventures of toddlerhood. She disliked generic cards and loved it when I would go to a local store and handpick out the cards. I still have a pile of cards stashed away. I have no clue what to do with them now.

She possessed very beautiful handwriting. The last card I received from her, a few months before she passed, acknowledged that this would be her last note. Handwriting had become strenuous for her. The last few lines she attempted to pen were shaky and difficult to read. I remember grieving our pen pal situation and immediately putting the letter in my keepsake box.

There are many things I will miss about my grandmother. One thing I still chuckle about is her resistance to almost anything tech-related.

She had a landline but never owned a mobile phone. She owned a TV sporadically but preferred her time to gardening, fiber crafts, and family visits. She brewed her coffee in an aged coffee pot until my dad brought over his old Keurig one day for her. She surprisingly got a kick out of it. Spending her early years growing up during the Great Depression, she proved very frugal. She would take each Keurig pod and use it twice to get the most out of it. It became a simple joy in her daily routine.

Her family would often encourage her to have a little more tech in her life. Especially a cell phone. They worried about her falling as she got older. She lived on her own until the end.

While I embrace tech a lot more in my life than my grandmother did. I believe my grandmother provided a good example of what it means to be mindful of tech. She had it in her life and enjoyed it when using it, but didn’t revolve her life around it.

She didn’t have a cell phone, but in return, she received more in-person visits from others, providing a stronger community around her. Instead of watching her shows, she knitted or handmade all the Christmas stockings for members of the family. I now have a meaningful item to hang up during the holiday season instead of something purchased randomly at a chain store.

The last letter I wrote to her arrived about two days before she died. She had been admitted to the comfort care section of the hospital and was no longer eating. I don’t think she was even awake. I told her one more time about the weather and that my daughter was currently going through a “naked baby” phase and refused to put on clothes. I ended by saying goodbye and telling her I loved her.

I like to think my grandma is in her own personal paradise right now. Gardening while drinking her second cup of Keurig brewed coffee, with her loved ones stopping by for a visit.